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Waiting For Superman

My Journal

2/15/14


Today I don't want to be introspective. I want to just be superficial, which is kind of different for me, not in an arrogant way, just in a factual way. I thought it was interesting when I read an article about a guy who decided to follow Ben Franklin's schedule for a day. Ben left time for study and to deal with spiritual things. The author said he almost never did that, and it was an interesting thing for him to do. Thinking about big things like God and purpose and why we are here and doing research into those questions is something I grew up doing and something I do all the time. How can you not wonder about that? How can you just go through life and just go to work, come home, be with your someone, party sometimes and that is it. That is satisfying? Really? Don't you wonder about things as a whole? Don't you wonder why we are here or how, or do you just take science's or God's word for it and leave it at that. I guess in a way you could have more of your emotional energy available to fritter away on personal drama. That might be interesting. I know it is kind of a weight on me to wonder about my, and our purpose, to wonder what or who else is out there, and it is a huge itch I am just dying to scratch to see everything as it really is. I used to think I would just go to heaven and God would explain it all to me and I could live with that. Now I am not so sure I will ever know, and ugh, that is annoying.

But to live without that burden, to me is to live in a closet. To live in the small world of what I see now. I just need to get out into the air and breath and wonder, and make wild guesses and hope. So with that comes the burden of what I don't know, of making choices and just not knowing if they are the right ones because I can't have all the information. I can't see past death or into the new millennium, so I have to make some of my best guesses blind.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

What I love about School



There are many things I love about teaching the kids myself. There are the programs we are in, the friends we have met, and then there are the times, like the one pictured here a few days ago, when my kids just do their own thing, and the thing they do is something I love to see them doing. Nina snuggled right up to Evan so he could read to her. Evan loves the feeling of being the big brother taking care of the younger kids. sometimes he will make up his own worksheets for them to do. Nina likes the feeling of her brother taking care of her. I know Arin is not in the picture. He is a little more independent. The kids might grumble about some of their work, but overall they are learning to learn every day all the time, even in fun ways, which is something I love.

Posted by Charlyn at 11:20 AM  

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